I can’t pretend
the ending didn’t almost kill me.
At the time,
I wasn’t sure it wouldn’t.

I spent my days
in a little hotel room,
begging a higher power
I wasn’t yet sure of
to wake me
from the nightmare
my life had become:

sleeping through the daylight,
drinking to survive
what losing myself
in another
had done,
unable to see
a way out.

Now, the nightmare has become a dream
I am still waking from.
As it fades into memory,
I am left
holding the parts of me
that survived,
finally learning
to find my way home
to myself.